How to…make a saltshaker….

..out of an old bottle (when there’s a power failure and only candles to illuminate the room):

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1. take a used bottle & cut it into three pieces. throw away the middle part.

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2. drill some holes into the lid with the knife of your choice

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3. fill it up with some salt…

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4. add rice to avoid moisture within the salt…

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5. close the shaker by fixing the bottom piece of the bottle

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6. ready! (you may want to add some adhesive tape to enhance stability)

Panari Empire

Have you ever wondered where all this Nakumatt Kitsch goes (I’ve mentioned earlier)? Ever thought about getting a taste of Dubai without leaving the beautiful City of Nairobi? Or spending some 800 bob on 60 minutes of ice skating?

Well, wait no longer – Kenya’s “new” Panari Sky Centre has it all.

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The Entrance looks a bit too Dubaiish. But compared to Grand Regency (which is another faux pas in terms of good taste) it is even worse. Big doors = big people? When I went inside, I saw a fat (very fat!!) American coming out. Hmm…

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“Solar Ice Rink” @ 500/= pp under 14, 800/= Kshs. over 14 years and adults. It looks a bit improvised, BUT it works and looks great. Even shoes are available in my size 12 (I asked).

Ok ok ok….the centre of course accomodates a Hotel as well – and this is what we came here for. We came for the view. And because I am afraid of heights. The other day, Mbuzimoja took me to Safari Tower downtown where we just took the lift to the top floor and searched for a view until we found the fire exit ladder. I couldn’t look down. But take pictures :-)

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This is the view from one of the floors where the rooms are located. Nice view. Please have a closer look at the interior design….hehe…
(=> this is a guests-only area….we stayed there until we got kicked out by Duncan, the security guy…)

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Nairobi National Park in front.

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Nakumatt Kitsch, exampoool 1

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Nakumatt Kitsch, exampooool 2

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Nakumatt Kitsch, exampoool 3

Just look at this picture: imported tiles, an ugly plastic Zebra carpet, some yellow & undefinable chairs from another spaceship (1970s rock, dude!) and a completely unfitting copy of an old (dutch, I pressume) oil painting.

In other words: the Panari Hotel has it all for those who ever wanted to get a glimpse of Dubai and never really developed their own (better) taste.

P.S.: the swimming pool looked nice though, even the Gym. Daily charges are 1.250 /= Kshs. pp., monthly membership 9.000 Kshs….they even have a Steam Bath!

the lights

So I was stuck in the usual traffic jam somewhere downtown and some hawkers approached me in my (borrowed) KXM Suzuki. The KXM registration (~ = 1986/87) should be reason enough to skip the annoying “mzungu = pesa” equation for a picture of someone who just happens to be in Kenya long enough not to buy anything from off the streets (although those things aren’t bad – only: who needs a goldfish bowl INCLUDING food as offered the other day for “just” 2.000 Kshs?). In other words: I am just as broke as Whispers used to be back in those days. Nairobi life is expensive.

Hawker #1: “Yesss…my friend…you want to buy this magazine?…or this one?….i give you good price”
me: “Aca.”
Hawker #1: “Oh…ok….so you are rrristening to Kameme FM?”
me: “Eh. I like it.”
Hawker #1: “Oh…so….your rrrrlights are on.”
me: “..alafu?”
Hawker #1: “No, I was just wondering”
me: “Yes, it is already 6.20 pm….I put them on…”

20m further down the road…

Hawker #2: “Yess…my friend…so how is you today? You want to buy this nice steering wheel cover?”
me: “Look, I have one right here, I don’t need a second”
Hawker #2: “But yours is broken”
me: “yeah….so what…”
Hawker #2: “And these cabooools (jump leads, booster cables)?”
me: “No, i already have so many tools in my car here and hardly ever need them”
Hawker #2: “And what about this hedge trimmer?”
me: “ati ??!! Me I don’t even have a garden….”
Hawker #2: “Oh…ok….so you are listening to Kameme FM? Do you understand what they are saying?”
me: “Yeah…well, no, I just like the sound of the words.”
Hawker #2: “Oh..hehe….sawa….oh, your lights are on…”
me (thinking): wtf?

15m further down the road…

Hawker #3: “Eh my friend…your lights are on”
me: YES, I PUT THEM ON!
etc.

(According to what is taught at local driving schools, lights should be on from 6.30 pm until 6.30 am).

The Nairobi traffic jams: makes me think what Half ‘n’ Half commented on the Githurai issue: “Kenyans just want to be seen in their cars.” How true.

Speaking about cars, I went to Kijiji Marketi this morning and saw these Rexton 4WDs from Korea on display in front of the market. The director of SYMC Motors (K) Ltd. showed me around and….well….the black one as pictured below (left) sells for about 4.5 mill. Kshs. (tax & VAT incl.).

Rexton

These SUVs look like the Mercedes M-class and are direct successors of the Mussos which were sold here some time ago (Mercedes engine and similar parts). Now, I would never buy any SUV if I could go for a real LandCruiser or even LandRover instead, but these Rextons surely offer a lot of comfort and luxury and should be compared to Mercedes which actually sell for almost the double price. The only thing that really irritated me was that the processing quality seems to be very low on these cars. I would like to see them on Kenyan roads for two or three years. Also, the contraction joints between the mudguard and the passengers door (especially on the above pictured white Rexton RX 290) where just horrible. My fundi friends back home would cry about these flawy cars SYMC Motors used for presentation.

I like their low budget approach, though. But then, even 4.5 mill Kshs. are A LOT of money.

Money? Yes:

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I found this 10 cents coin on the parking lot of a Ministry in downtown Nairobi and showed it to a Security Guard. The guy just threw it back on the ground and said: “ah…useless…”.

That’s Nairobi.

silica gel fun

What happens when you mix Silica Gel with water? Silica Gel, these little pebbles inside of food packagings (like my emtpy Sushinori bag here) which are supposed to absorb any moisture…

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…well….it starts to react with the water and jumps up and down (just like popcorn!):

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“Silica Gel has been the favored desiccant of the government and industry since World War II. It prevents rust, corrosion, tarnish, oxidation, mildew, fungus, mold, odor, spoilage, spotting, toning, and stains. Silica Gel is an extremely important substance in the world today, which makes it especially unfortunate that so few people give it the respect it deserves.” (source)

AOB: country bumpkin are strange
AOB2: the pope @ home (Bavaria) – WHAT a welcome….amazing…